IT'S MY BIRTHDAYYY



Yours Alone

Verse:

If I say I’ll live for You
For the glory of my King
If I say I’ll count the cost
And offer You my everything
If I pray with all my heart
My way to be Your way

And I just want to live
The very words I say

My God I Pray

Chorus:

Not my will but Yours alone
let my life be not my own
Till everything I am is just for You

Bridge:

So far beyond the songs I sing
I’m gonna honor You as King

If You live in me I can live for You

Love this song (((:

I was watching finding nemo and something just struck me.

nemo and dory got eaten by a whale on accident (they happened to be amongst some shrimps. HAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH. okay not funny) and they got stuck in its mouth. Suddenly, the water in its mouth started to drain down his throat and his tongue flipped backwards so they were like AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH and clung onto its tongue. then the whale made some funny noise and dory was like "okay!" and let go. Nemo grabbed dory's fin immediately and their conversation went like this:

nemo: NOOOOOOOOOOOO, DORY DONT!
dory: He said it's time to let go! Everything's gonna be alright!
nemo: How do you know! How do you know something bad's not gonna happen!
dory: (pause) I dont!
nemo: (pause) *closes eyes tightly and let go.*

i really really from the rock bottom of my heart admire dory. How she could just TRUST. like that. no further questions asked and just let go. To nemo, he was afraid that the whale told them to let go because it wanted to eat them but to dory, she just trusted the whale(i really think she can speak whale). And this led me to think. If God was like the whale here, wish i would be able to let go like dory did. i realise that i often take things into my own hands and worry that i wont be able to do it-- things like tests/exams/serving/making time for God or even trying to resolve conflicts. Even though God promised that i'll be safe in Jer 39:18,

Jeremiah 39:18 (New International Version)
18 I will save you; you will not fall by the sword but will escape with your life, because you trust in me, declares the LORD.' " sometimes i choose not to count on it in case i get disappointed or i just simply lack the faith that God will deliver me. But think:

Trust.

that's all God requires of us. why is it so hard? Why do we not believe that He can deliver us and bring us through anything when He has proven himself and time and time and time and time and time AND TIMEEEE again in the bible. Our God is bigger and has control than anything and everything. so we can totally trust Him with everything. (:

I'm coming back to the heart of worship
And it's all about You
All about You, Jesus I
'm sorry Lord for the thing I've made it
When it's all about You
It's all about You Jesus

This song really reminded me of what it means when we say 'worship is a lifestyle'.

It means our whole life, everything we do, is about Jesus. loveeeee!

What we call "being in love" is a glorious state, and, in several ways, good for us. It helps to make us generous and courageous, it opens our eyes not only to the beauty of the beloved but to all beauty, and it subordinates (especially at first) our merely animal sexuality; in that sense, love is the great conqueror of lust. No one in his senses would deny that being in love is far better than either common sensuality or cold self-centredness.

But, as I said before, "the most dangerous thing you can do is to take any one impulse of our own nature and set it up as the thing you ought to follow at all costs." Being in love is a good thing, but it is not the best thing. There are many things below it, but there are also things above it. You cannot make it the basis of a whole life. It is a noble feeling, but it is still a feeling. Now no feeling can be relied on to last in its full intensity, or even to last at all. Knowledge can last, principles can last, habits can last; but feelings come and go. And in fact, whatever people say, the state called "being in love" usually does not last. If the old fairytale ending "They lived happily ever after" is taken to mean "They felt for the next fifty years exactly as they felt the day before they were married," then it says what probably never was nor ever could be true, and would be highly undesirable if it were. Who could bear to live in that excitement for even five years? What would become of your work, your appetite, your sleep, your friendships?

But, of course, ceasing to be "in love" need not mean ceasing to love. Love in this second sense - love as distinct from "being in love" is not merely a feeling. It is a deep unity, maintained by the will and deliberately strengthened by habit; reinforced by (in Christian marriages) the grace which both parents ask, and receive, from God. They can have this love for each other even at those moments when they do not like each other; as you love yourself even when you do not like yourself. They can retain this love even when each would easily, if they allowed themselves, be "in love" with someone else. "Being in love" first moved them to promise fidelity: this quieter love enables them to keep the promise. It is on this love that the engine of marriage is run: being in love was the explosion that started it.

- C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity

Doesnt this dude just make so much sense???? sense. ***

Kimmm found out she's suffering from chronic unbelief. pray with me? :) i know you will. ***

*** am i being ego or do i just like to answer my own questions (i.e. zi wen zi da)

just for seeyue cuz seeyue's awesome and cool for always sharing cool stuff with everyone

<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3

"Let me explain the problem science has with Jesus Christ." The atheist professor of philosophy pauses before his class and then asks one of his new students to stand.

"You're a Christian, aren't you, son?"

"Yes sir," the student says.

"So you believe in God?"

"Absolutely."

"Is God good?"

"Sure! God's good."

"Is God all-powerful? Can God do anything?"

"Yes."

"Are you good or evil?"

"The Bible says I'm evil."

The professor grins knowingly. "Aha! The Bible!" He considers for a moment.

"Here's one for you. Let's say there's a sick person over here and you can cure him. You can do it. Would you help him? Would you try?"

"Yes sir, I would."

"So you're good...!"

"I wouldn't say that."

"But why not say that? You'd help a sick and maimed person if you could. Most of us would if we could. But God doesn't."

The student does not answer, so the professor continues. "He doesn't, does he? My brother was a Christian who died of cancer, even though he prayed to Jesus to heal him How is this Jesus good? Hmmm? Can you answer that one?"

The student remains silent.

"No, you can't, can you?" the professor says. He takes a sip of water from a glass on his desk to give the student time to relax.

"Let's start again, young fella Is God good?"

"Er...yes," the student says.

"Is Satan good?"

The student doesn't hesitate on this one. "No."

"Then where does Satan come from?"

The student : "From...God..."

"That's right. God made Satan, didn't he? Tell me, son. Is there evil in this world?"

"Yes, sir."

"Evil's everywhere, isn't it? And God did make everything, correct?"

"Yes."

"So who created evil?" The professor continued, "If God created everything, then God created evil, since evil exists, and according to the principle that our works define who we are, then God is evil."

Without allowing the student to answer, the professor continues: "Is there sickness? Immorality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things, do they exist in this world?"

The student: "Yes."

"So who created them?"

The student does not answer again, so the professor repeats his question. "Who created them? There is still no answer. Suddenly the lecturer breaks away to pace in front of the classroom. The class is mesmerized.

"Tell me," he continues onto another student. "Do you believ e in Jesus Christ, son?"

The student's voice is confident: "Yes, professor, I do."

The old man stops pacing.. "Science says you have five senses you use to identify and observe the world around you. Have you ever seen Jesus?"

"No sir. I've never seen Him"

"Then tell us if you've ever heard your Jesus?"

"No, sir, I have not."

"Have you ever actually felt your Jesus, tasted your Jesus or smelt your Jesus? Have you ever had any sensory perception of Jesus Christ, or God for that matter?"



"No, sir, I'm afraid I haven't."

"Yet you still believe in him?"

"Yes."

"According to the rules of empirical, testable, demonstrable protocol, science says your God doesn't exist. What do you say to that, son?"

"Nothing," the student replies. "I only have my faith."

"Yes, faith," the professor repeats. "And that is the problem science has with God. There is no evidence, only faith."

The student stands quietly for a moment, before asking a question of his own. "Professor, is there such thing as heat?"

"Yes," the professor replies. "There's heat."

"And is there such a thing as cold?"

"Yes, son, there's cold too."

"No sir, there isn't."



The professor turns to face the student, obviously interested. The room suddenly becomes very quiet.. The student begins to explain.

"You can have lots of heat, even more heat, super-heat, mega-heat, unlimited heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat, but we don't have anything called 'cold'. We can hit up to 458 degrees below zero, which is no heat, but we can't go any further after that. There is no such thing as cold; otherwise we would be able to go colder than the lowest -458 degrees. Every body or object is susceptible to study when it has or transmits energy, and heat is what makes a body or matter have or transmit energy. Absolute zero (-458 F) is the total absence of heat. You see, sir, cold is only a word we use to describe the absence of heat. We cannot measure cold. Heat we can measure in thermal units because heat is energy. Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it."

Silence across the room. A pen drops somewhere in the classroom, sounding like a hammer.

"What about darkness, professor. Is there such a thing as darkness?"

"Yes," the professor replies without hesitation. "What is night if it isn't darkness?"

"You're wrong again, sir. Darkness is not something; it is the absence of something. You can have low light, normal light, bright light,

flashing light, but if you have no light constantly you have nothing and it's called darkness, isn't it? That's the meaning we use to define the word. In reality, darkness isn't. If it were, you would be able to make darkness darker, wouldn't you?"

The professor begins to smile at the student in front of him. This will be a good semester. " So what point are you making, young man?"

"Yes, professor. My point is, your philosophical premise is flawed to start with, and so your conclusion must also be flawed."

The professor's face cannot hide his surprise this time. "Flawed? Can you explain how?"

"You are working on the premise of duality," the student explains. "You argue that there is life and then there's death; a good God and a bad God. You are viewing the concept of God as something finite, something we can measure. Sir, science can't even explain a thought. It uses electricity and magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one. To view death as the opposite of life is to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive thing. Death is not the opposite of life, just the absence of it."

"Now tell me, professor. Do you teach your students that they evolved from a monkey?"

"If you are referring to the natural evolutionary process, young man, yes, of course I do"

"Have you ever observed evolution with your own eyes, sir?"

The professor begins to shake his head, still smiling, as he realizes where the argument is going. A very good semester, indeed.

"Since no one has ever observed the process of evolution at work and cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavor, are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you now not a scientist, but a preacher?"

The class is in uproar. The student remains silent until the commotion has subsided.

"To continue the point you were making earlier to the other student, let me give you an example of what I mean."

The student looks around the room. "Is there anyone in the class who has ever seen the professor's brain?" The class breaks out into laughter.

"Is there anyone here who has ever heard the professor's brain, felt the professor's brain, touched or smelled the professor's brain? No one appears to have done so. So, according to the established rules of empirical, stable, demonstrable protocol, science says that you have no brain, with all due respect, sir. So if science says you have no brain, how can we trust your lectures, sir?"

Now the room is silent. The professor just stares at the student, his face unreadable.

Finally, after what seems an eternity, the old man answers. "I guess you'll have to take them on faith."

"Now, you accept that there is faith, and, in fact, faith exists with life," the student continues. "Now, sir, is there such a thing as evil?"

Now uncertain, the professor responds, "Of course, there is. We see it everyday. It is in the daily example of man's inhumanity to man. It is in the multitude of crime and violence everywhere in the world. These manifestations are nothing else but evil."

To this the student replied, "Evil does not exist sir, or at least it does not exist unto itself. Evil is simply the absence of God.. It is just

like darkness and cold, a word that man has created to describe the absence of God.

God did not create evil. Evil is the result of what happens when man does not have God's love present in his heart. It's like the cold that comes when there is no heat or the darkness that comes when there is no light."

The professor sat down.

dear my fav 2,

today i had a bad bad bad day:( i got scolded x3.
first, during history lecture mr ngeoi scolded everyone for not putting in effort for terms. not doing enough. i actually did put in effort for terms, but not my 100% so i deserved that scolding. he made alot of sense. what have i been doing??? i do my tutorials, read my notes, study for all my tests but his lecture just made me feel like i havent done enough. i was quite freaked out cuz he was so fierce, he exploded:( so i was quite shaken alr
second, mr kor saw lynn scolded me cuz he said i was being rude to him when i acidentally snatched my mc from him. i got such a shock i started crying in front of him and he exploded too.. i must have embarrased him because evee and jomama were there too. he kept asking me "why were you so rude! why are you crying! why! why! why! i dont understand why! WHYYY!" and i just cried even more like it just came out, i couldnt control it:( plus he's so fierce. like i cant say "cuz im scared of you:(". so he was really upset with me and i just couldnt stop crying i didnt know what to do:( i feel like crying even noww
third, history tutorial with mr tay & i didnt bring my essay:( i really did it i spent a long time my day just couldnt get any worser. he didnt scold me but my class really dissapointed him so he scolded everyone
i feel so emo nemo. i was so upset i think theres something really wrong with me even tho i think i didnt do anything wrong intially im not so sure now

But you know what....?
1 impt lesson i have always rmbed was that when i feel emo, dont fight emotions with emotions. fight emotions with the truth. because truth>emotions.
emotions sometime make you feel like you dont love God and that you just want to wallow in your emoness or like listen to a sad song but i happened to read ecclesiastes

ecc 7:14 "when times are good, be happy; but when times are bad, consider: God has made the one as well as th other"

that is the truth. and altho i may feel like circumstances make me feel like i dont love God, i do.

i started crying to God, like telling him how hard it was for me. and i really believe like how it says when you dont know how to pray, the spirit intercedes for you. and i told God how i really loved him, admist all. i really do.

ecc 3:14 " I know that everything God does will endure forever' nothing can be added to it and nothing taken from it"

i went for prayer meeting in that unstable state of mind. and i was really upset because i havent been right with God whole week. I thank God for sining(classmate), i texted her and she said God doesnt shortchange His people, and that i'll always have access to His wisdom. And you know i really thank God for sining, cuz she's someone i can share my faith so comfortably with. We think quite alike and i know that God really placed me and her in my life because we have gone through so many of the same experiences/ struggles in faith and she actually understands. God has such an awesome plan, i'm really very excited for the next year and the many many years to come where we can grow together. i really really love her. so i believe God really provides:)

Sorry if i was ranting

I love watching videos on youtube. Some just brings to me the reality of life and how people NEED God. it makes me want to shout out to people in trying situations "God's hand is right there! take it!"

This week has been pretty weird for me. Having confusions and decisions to make. i hope i can meet up with my 2 darlings this week.

This week, i was reminded of something i have long forgotten. That God should always be my FIRST LOVE.

FIRST LOVE...
means that no one matters more to me than Him.
means that i need nothing else but Him
means that i can rest confortably in Him.
means that i desire and willingly serve Him.
means that i trust Him.

080809 edit/

first love also means that i sacrifice for Him. because you know you TRULY DEFINITELY SURELY CONFIRM+GUARANTEE love a person when you sacrifice for Him.

my 2 darlings. i think i have an answer.

I Am Your Child

The living, the living- they praise you, as I am doing today; fathers tell their children about your faithfulness.
-Isaiah 38:19

Lord, I live today as Your child. I plan to focus on this identity. Undoubtly I will be asking for guidance, messing things up, getting Your plans dirty, and constantly asking, "Why? Why?" But You are used to the floundering of Your children. You are a patient parent. The lessons You have taught me in Your Word and through Your active love are helping me grow. I can see the person you want me to become.

Like a child, I will run in a lot of different directions before asking the way. And by then, I will probably need to be carried. It is very exhausting being a child. But now, as You lift me up and comfort me with your promises of love and grace, I settle down. To be wrapped in Your faithfulness is all I needed..... I just did'nt know how to get there. When I am done resting, will You tell me a story? I love the one about the day I became your child.

kimmie posting here.

Psm 145:13 "Your kingdom is an everlasting kingdom, and your dominion endures through all generations. The Lord is faithful to all his promises and loving toward all he has made"

I spent time praying for comm while waiting to fall asleep last night. It was very heavy upon my heart to pray for protection for each of them. Their names went through my mind and I started interceding for them. Recently I have been feeling that there is alot of spiritual warfare going on(as much as I hate to admit it). Its very unsettling. And I tend to commit the sin of worrying:( So many many many things have made me realise the reality of the battle that isnt against flesh. If you ask me personally, i'll tell you what are the things. And so i got up to find out more about spiritual attacks and spiritual warfare. Its hard to be strong and courageous when your fear is clobbering your faith. Seeyue asked me fear of what. Fear of the unknown. Its not that i dont believe God can handle all these things, its just that I lose focus. But God never fails to reassure me. I studied Isaiah 5:1-7 yesterday and I felt like I'm just the keeper of God's vineyard. Isaiah 5:4(Jesus speaking) 'What more could have been done for my vineyard than i have done for it?'. God reminded me that sets everything for good but if we/i am not spirit-led or have that sensitivity to His voice admist everything that drowns it out, we produce bad fruit.

I delight in God because He gives me 2 verses my heart really needed..

Isaiah 54:17 " No weapon formed against you shall prosper, and every tongue which rises against you in judgement you shall condemn. This is the herritage of the servants of the Lord, and their righteousness is from me," says the Lord

2 Chro 16:9 " For the eyes of the Lord run to, and fro throughout the whole earth, to show Himself strong on behalf of those whose heart is loyal to Him"

Admist all these, I have never felt I loved God more. I have never desired to bless His heart as much as I do now. I have never enjoyed His sweet presence as I have during this period..

But i was reminded once again how real this battle was once again, with shalyn jiap eve all not being able to go for cf installaton. It just came, so unexpected. It was climaxing this morning. My heart really couldnt take it. Plus I havent been feeling very well this weekend. On the way to fmc, my dad even lost his temper on the road and i just couldnt take it anymore.. I wanted to cry. I know i'm not strong at all:'( so i messaged my fav 2. But they dont really know what im going through because i havent got time to tell them. I hope you both see this:(
But guess what God still revealed to me 1 more thing during cf installation today. And that He is good. He is good. He is good. He is good. He is good. He is wonderfully good. wtv shit this world brings, He is just good. I tell you. He is so good. I just felt that so immensely today during worship. And I just praised Him in this trial and storm whatever you call it. I cant attempt to tell you how it feels like when God meets you during worship and you as much as life doesnt allow you to believe that God is in control, as the words of God and the promises of his word come forth, you cant help but believe and come in line with His eternal perspective. i <3 God.
and so kimmie's all time favourite
psm 37:4 "delight yourself in the Lord and He will grant you the desire of your heart"

I live by this psalm, because i dont know any other way to live in this world.




P.S. this will only be here for a limited time, because i dont like my thoughts not hidden away. its like part of me is ripped out and placed here for everyone and anyone.

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